Good Men in My Life
Lee and I dated in high school in Roby Texas. Her family moved to Haskell Texas as she went into her junior year…the town where I was born…and her parents lived there the rest of their lives.
So when we married, Haskell became a once a month visit. “Going to Nanny’s”. On one such trip the following happened and became a small event that had a profound effect on my life.
I would never go to Haskell without a visit to my Aunt Shorty and Uncle Dud. I showed up at their house around noon on this Saturday and missed Uncle Dud by a few minutes since he went to the pool hall on Saturdays. After a visit with this wonderful woman I set out to the pool hall.
If you have never been in a small west Texas town’s pool hall…you have missed one of life’s unique pleasures. On the town square this space is full of 8 Ball and Snooker tables. The sound of balls clacking together always present…on Saturdays joined by the sound of old men poking good natured fun at the shooters and telling stories to people who have heard all their stories before…many times. Farmers and blue collar workers, some retired and some still working come together for a few hours each week and form a community. In this community will be the history and heart of a large number of people spanning many years. A living record.
As I moved thru the tables and chairs, I spoke to those I recognized and many I didn’t and found my uncle halfway to the back…drinking a coke…waiting on his turn to shoot. He hugged me, chalked his cue and studied his shot while those at his table ribbed him about my being there might change his luck. The banter that days like this are built around.
And Then It Happened
It happened so quick I almost missed it. At the end of the table and against the wall were a group you could easily believe were “The Elders”. An old man wearing overalls over a blue work shirt with a little snuff in the creases of his cheeks spoke up.
“Your Edith’s boy aren’t you?
Yes I am.
I knew your family. I worked with your granddad Joe. When times were hard and we had nothing he would share what little he and his family had. HE WAS A GOOD MAN.“
And just like that my understanding of who I was and the place I held in this world was changed forever….that small conversation. I was being accorded a respect I did not earn. I was being blessed by my grandfather.
Since then I measure people a little differently. I measure myself differently. And I realize that much of who I am and how I live is a product of the GOOD MEN who have crossed my life and left their mark. Now don’t misunderstand. There have been many GOOD WOMEN in my life but I believe that it takes a man to teach a boy to be a man.
Good men are all around us. As a teen I watched Coach Hodges and Coach Rasco literally pour out their sweat trying to teach me that hard work equals excellence. Then they would go home and work faithfully to make our town a better place for us all to live.
I watched Johnny “PeeWee” Stewart work six long days a week running his service station. I watched him befriend me and others like me. At 15 years old he trusted me to pump my own gas and go the the ticket box and mark down the amount and pay him when I could. If I needed a couple of bucks I could take it and mark that down too. I found that I would do anything not to betray the trust he put in me.
Many other men in that small community trusted as the default in dealing with me…I now know how hard that can be.
The lessons didn’t stop when I was grown. I served on a church board with my business partners. Charles Wilson and David Yarbrough. I watched them live out their faith in business dealings and teach me what true integrity looked like. A friend John Peck showed me what a servant’s heart looked like. And many others.
Each stage of life offers challenges. Health, politics, finances and faith continue to be forks in the road. Each one offering a chance to be better or to be selfish. I give in to the petty far more than I would like. But I am encouraged by the examples I see all around me.
This is not meant to be a list of Good Men in my life. This story is my understanding of what is important. My thanks to the GOOD MEN who made a difference.